Things more stable. Thank God!

It's been sometime since I wrote in my blog. Well, things had happened and I really needed time to think through what I needed to do.

What happened was I found myself having difficulty to work with my colleague. Sometimes, I would find that she did not inform me things and when problems or issues arose, she would ask me how come I never informed her. It was tough at that time. Besides, I was so free every day that I did not new what I did. I really thought of resigning. But then, I know that I would not be able to find another job that I enjoy as much as I do now. So I shared with my closed friends. One of the more stabled ones told me about an article she read. The writer was a foreigner and he noted that Singaporeans did not inform their bosses of how they felt about certain situations and resigned from the jobs. It was noted that such actions were unfair to them. So she told me to let my boss know what was going on. But I must be very objective rather than pin-pointing my colleague.

So I did and I never regreted it. I told my boss that I felt my colleague and I had very different working styles. Hers was a slow and cautious while mine was do it fast and move on. So my boss arranged a meeting for both of us; firstly to let us know precisely our roles so that there would be a clear role definition, and secondly to iron out any grievances. The meeting went well. We both felt better after the meeting. Besides, now at least in what we do, we can joke and tease each other because of our understanding of each other's working styles.

I must say that if I bottle up the frustation, I will be the one in the losing end. Thank God for showing me the way through my friends. I pray that God, You will continue to send more elderly willing to accept You as their Lord and Personal Savior. For those who have already accepted You, I pray that they will be willing to obey You by going through water baptism, just like uncle Boey Yin Meng, uncle Fong Fook Seng and auntie Lie Bie Kee. Also, I pray that uncle Tan Thian Her will do the crafts given to him properly and not rush into it. For auntie Hoe Kim Kee, I pray that I will be able to think of some crafts which she is able to engage in due to her poor eye sight. In Jesus' name I commit these elderly to You, Amen.

A time to reflect

Last Saturday, I had a good gathering with my friends. Some of them I have not seen for months since the last gathering that we had.

Somehow, seeing them makes me reflect on many things. How we met, how we struggled to keep our friendships together despite the odds, how we struggled in our work, how we rubbed each other's shoulders at times, etc. No matter what happened to anyone of us, we always try to carry each other' burdens. However, there may be some who expect others to carry their burden but refuse to carry other people's burden. Sad but simple fact!

Sometimes, I think if I will to stay in AIA now, how will I survive? How will my life be different now? Similarly, if I will to stay in TCC, how will my life be now? What kind of tasks will I be exposed to now? Then moving to CCSS, should I continue to work in here? Where's the zeal that I had when I first stepped into CCSS? Why am I so dried up now? How come I don't know what to do at work now? Is it something wrong with me or am I expecting too much?

Lord, please show me the way, the clear specific direction that You want me to go. I pray that You will grant me the wisdom of words to speak to HJ tomorrow by creating a good environment for us to talk and for me to pour out what is in my mind without pointing finger at anyone. I pray that if this talk fails, then show me what You want me to do. Give me money to pay off bills, debts, expenses and still have money to save for rainy days. Let all that I do be a stepping stone to where You want me to be ultimately. Help me to overcome obstacles and difficult people. Help me to see what You see. Lord, I need You to go through this life. PLEASE, LORD, HELP ME. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Feelings of sadness and worries!

Today, I was quite chippy and happy at first. But then in the afternoon, suddenly the mood changed. I don't know why.

This morning, I got a call from my cell leader's friend who was also an eye specialist. He had gotten my handphone number from the cell leader and came to know about my eye condition. So he was willing to let me see him earlier than my supposed appointment date in SNEC. Thank God! Else, I don't know what I am applying to my eyes and whether it will cause any problem if I am not a glaucoma patient. I smsed my cell leader to inform him of this status and requested that the cell members to pray for me.

Then when I was having my lunch, suddenly, I felt a little pain on my left eyes. I tried to use my left eye to focus on things and the pain was there more often. During my part time job meeting, suddenly, my vision went blur. I was feeling irritated by that. I don't know what is wrong. Lord, what happened? You said through Pastor Dom that this year would be a year of prosperity. I claimed on that, but from the beginning of this year, all I received were bad news. My bills went up, I had zero amount in my bank account, I had not have any closed cases in refinancing, I had no leads for property sales, my eyes' condition seemed to be getting worse. What's wrong Lord??? Am I meant to be in debts till the day I die? Am I meant to have lost my vision? Lord, what is going on? Please tell me. I am feeling terrible inside and there is no one whom I can share this with. Lord, please help me. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Where should I turn Lord - Part 2

Yesterday, during my meeting with my boss, she suddenly told me that she found it a surprise that I could stand on stage during the Christmas Combined Celebration and Ra-Ra the elderly in the activities. She thought that I was the quiet, shy type as that was the 'me' she saw when I was in the office.

Then during lunch, she announced it to my other colleagues who were sitting in the same table as us. When she mentioned that, I kinda felt embarrassed. Frankly speaking, it is really by God's grace that I am able to stand in front of 50 over elderly each week twice and saying something in front of them. If I were to do that a few years back, I don't think I have the ability and courage to do. Thank God for Your provision.

And that brought me to think through whether I should venture full-time into property. Well, a few days ago, my friend had joined the property industry as a full-time property consultant. I actually encouarged her to do so as I find that this industry is something worth venturing into. Then her manager who is also my friend, asked me whether I had the intention to join full time. Being a part-time property consultant is alright for me, but venturing into full time, well? A lot at stake! First of all, the thing that I am constantly worried about was my family and my financial situation. Going into full-time property consultant means that I may not get money every month, unless this is something which God wants me to do. I still remember what Pastor Beatrice told me when I resigned from Trinity Christian Centre. 'Go to a new place because God is asking you to go there and His presence is going with you. Don't do it because of someone else.'

So Lord, should I venture into full-time there or here? Where to head to Lord? I need You to guide me and teach me Your ways. I have wasted some of the time doing my own things before. I don't want to do that anymore. Teach me what to do. Show me the clear specific direction. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Where should I turn Lord?

I have thinking about my tasks in life and what I have gone through and what I will be going through since the beginning of December.

Life has been great by God's grace. I was able to face an audience without trembling or having butterflies in my stomach. I was even able to come up with programs to excite the elderly and conquer the fear of doing crafts. In fact, it is very encouraging when the elderly see the final product that they make and exclaim what a beautiful thing they have done.

Apart from this, finances seem to be on the downturn. Every though I try to handle and plan the finances to be spent in the most correct possible way I can think of, I still owe much money. My credit bills keep increasing and I am unable to pay them. What's worse is that I have taken another credit advance for payment of another credit card bill.

In the midst of all these, I went to work part time as property agent. I begin calling clients who may be interested in refinancing their loans since this is the hot topic now. At first, it was met with much disappointment. But I managed to put through. Today is already the third day. I believe I can convince some owners to consider this scheme and agree to meet bankers and close the deal. I AM DESPARATE FOR MONEY! Iwant to earn money in the legal way. There is a lot of hard work but I am willing to do the extra.

However, the next question that comes is whether I should do full time instead of just part time. Though now I have not earned my first pay cheque there, I believe that by this month, I will be able to get some money through this scheme. Lord, I really need Your help. PLEASE GIVE ME $3,000 TO PAY MY LOANS, BILLS, DEBTS, EXPENSES AND STILL HAVE MONEY TO SAVE FOR RAINY DAYS BY THIS MONTH. I boldly ask this in Jesus' name. With my own strength, a lot of things cannot be done. But with Your help, I believe I can do much more. Please show me whether I should go full time to this area. Lord, I want to hear Your voice in this. Let me know the direction I should go.

I commit all these to You in Jesus' name, Amen.

What a frustrated day!

Today is really a very frustrated day for me.

First, I got a call from a vendor to ask me to collect the items which they intended to give to us on my own. I was not told in the first place or else I would have taken another different route to collect the things first. Besides, I need to quickly rush to work to do shifting, moving and carrying of things.

Secondly, I got a rude shock when I went to work this morning. Things were messed up and I was not informed. What's worse was that I was alone doing all the carrying, moving and shifting. Thank God for some sisters who helped me to shift the things, or else I would have delayed their programmes.

Then, when I was distributing the things, I realized that there were duplications. When I called someone to verify, I was shocked to know that this person knew about this but did not bother to inform me either via sms or email.

Sigh! Sometimes, I really think that I was taken for a ride in work. That places me in a difficult light when I want to change something or implement something. I feel like a redundant person where I am just following someone else wishes to do things than what I really want to do. That's why when my friend asks me to do certain things, I hesitate for quite a while. While yesterday, I can sense that he may be angry that I keep asking him to repeat what he says. But I really cannot hear what he says. Whatever it is, I feel very trapped.

Why do I have to be in this cross-road again Lord? What is the thing You want to do in me? What do You want me to learn from this? How can I see You working in my life now? Lord, I am in distress. I need Your guidance. Teach me Your ways Lord. PLEASE!

Mixed feelings!

Nowadays, I am really feeling very vexed and at the same time, I am reviewing what I am supposed to do.

At my full time workplace, I find myself having to do so many tasks while my other colleague is only suggesting things. I feel very drained. I want to visit more elderly to get to know them better but in Macpherson area, I have to find a volunteer to go with me. Usually, this volunteer can only make it after 4pm. By the time he arrives, we can only visit one elderly and that's it. In the other centre, I am able to combine the efforts of 2 volunteers who are able to go with me for visitation whenever they are free. But I feel that they are being taken for granted by my colleague, just like she takes advantage of the driver volunteers. Certain things which can be done earlier have been pushed to the last minute and that's when she will start arrowing people to do. Sometimes, she will just order people to do things instead of asking. Well, these few days she arrows me to do certain things and in the end, she suggests postponing some things to next year due to Chinese New Year. I feel very tired to do things so last minute. I share these experiences with my elder brother and he suggests that I speak to her with my new superior. But I know my character too well. If I will to speak up, it will be too direct. Afterall, I am a thinker, not a feeler!

Just when I am thinking about my whole episode in this company, my friend who introduces me to be part-time property agent called me and told me about the new things that were coming up in the company. After hearing from him, I really want to jump at the suggestions and start doing what he suggests. At least that will give me the opportunity to know whether I am cut to do property or not! If God wills, I really hope that I can do some sales. It is very tiring to do paper work and be stuck in the office all day long. I want to meet people, to apply what I have learnt in Psychology and see how I can motivate and perceive people.

Lord, should I just jump the wagon now? I know this is too soon. I have made a hoo-haa when I decided to come back here to work. Now, leaving will really mean leaving, no turning back this time. I pray for Your guidance Lord. I need You to tell me what to do. I want to earn more money to alleviate my family's financial situation but with my current pay, I can only default payment, something which I have not done before. Weighing the pros and cons of staying, I seem to have left with more cons than pros. Lord, what should I do? Please teach me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

My first enjoyable experience with a child

This week has been a very busy week. Not only do we have Christmas celebrations in Leng Kee CC, we also had our combined Christmas celebrations at Macpherson. In both celebrations, the children were so adorable and obedient. Of course there were the few 'black sheeps', but the overall experience were good.

Yesterday, our little volunteer also came to help us. In fact, she helped us for these two Christmas celebrations. She is none other than one of our volunteers' daughter, Chiara. When I first met her, she was very quiet. Till today, she is but at least she opened herself yesterday.

After helping out at the Christmas celebration, I brought her to Orchard Road. I was very surprised to see how happy a child was in going out to the street. In fact, when I told her that I would be bringing her to Orchard Road, she did not believe. But after she confirmed it with her father, she was so happy that she played around the Christmas decoration. Then I brought her to my eye specialist appointment. There, she opened herself more. She told me that her father used to cane her but now, the occurence was much lesser except when she had done something wrong. When I told her that I would be bringing her to see movie, eat dinner and then shopping around, she looked at me in disbelief. Only when she called her father did she believe me. When her father agreed, her eyes lightened up so much that it seemed like she had not gone to see a movie for a long, long time. When I asked her, I was shocked to learn that I was right. A child her age should be given much more. But due to the working standards of her parents, she was often left alone at home with her two younger brothers and maid. During her free time, she will read or play games herself. Sometimes, her brothers will play with her. But most of the time, she is alone, doing her things.

Yesterday, I managed to get to know this little girl better. She is not only a very obedient child but I notice that when she is in a new environment, she seems very anxious that she keeps rubbing her hands. Also, she is like me in a way; her hands will be very cold the minute she goes into an air-con room. At the very mention of her father, she seems to be very afraid. All she does, she must get her father's approval. The way she talks, it seems that she does not seem confident enough. May God be with this child that she will overcome her social anxiety. Lord, guide her heart towards You daily. Help her to see Your plans in her life. I pray for protection and peace to be with her. When she is in a new environment, I pray that You will guide her and let her not be anxious or scared. I pray for Your guidance to be on her. Within my means, I pray that I will be able to bring her out more often so that she can be exposed to more things around her.

May You be with her. I commit her in Jesus' name, Amen!

My crafts

When I was looking through my things, I suddenly realized how many crafts that I had done. Well, I had done cross stitching so much that I was left with so many. I am thinking of giving them away as Christmas gifts, but not sure whether anyone will appreciate it or will criticise it because of my shobby works. So before I do so, here are some of the finished works. Some of the works are not done properly because I was learning then. But as I get to do more, the skills improve. And I am proud to say that I manage to teach the elderly to do cross stitch. Can't wait to see their end products.

Then I move on crochet. To tell you the truth, doing crochet was alot more difficult than I think. As I have not been doing crochet for a while, I find that I cannot remember how to do some simple steps. When I decided to teach the elderly on crochet, I suddenly could not remember how to do a simple worm bookmark. So I quickly searched through the internet. Thank God for the information on the internet. Not only did I find the correct way of doing it, I also found how to end the crochet neatly and was able to show with the elderly.

My latest craft that I did was to do a simple box using plastic canvas. Actually, I just did it today and managed to finish it. Though this is my first try in doing this, I think the end product looks alright to me. I hope that I can teach the elderly to do this so that if they are able to finish this product, then I can teach them to do a bag. High ambitions! God, please give me more brain juices and creativity and help me to find cheap materials.

Feeling helpless!

This evening, I suddenly felt very helpless. I have only 2 weeks left to handle the items to be purchased for the Combined Christmas celebration. Yet, it seemed that everything seemed to be on the stand. I need volunteers but so far only 4 volunteers can confirm their availability. I need money to purchase the items for this event, but I am cash-tight. I really don't know what to do.

I remember what Pastor Wilson shared this morning. In times of doing things, especially during difficult moments at work, do we see Jesus in there? Lord, I need thee to guide me how to handle this event. I need thee to teach me how to prioritise my work and my finances. I need thee every moment to guide me and lead me in the right direction. Teach me Your ways Lord. Let me be a blessing to the people around me. Let me not burst my anger when things don't go my way. But grant me the serenity and guidance and wisdom. In Jesus' name, Amen.

My first Singapore Flyer Outing

On Thursday, our elderly in LKCC finally went to Singapore Flyer. It was supposed to be a happy outing until something unpleasant happened.

Well, what happened was the driver who was picking us at LKCC was very unco-operative. When I met him to let him know that the elderly would be alighting the bus soon, he said in a very rude tone to quicken the pace as the place had a very narrow 2-way road. Then when all the elderly and volunteers went to the bus, he commented that there were so many people, if anything happened, insurance could not pay etc... While he was grumbling at us, we were discussing on whether our driver volunteer should drive some elderly instead. Finally, we decided to and I checked with my colleague about this. While she was choosing the elderly, the driver kept looking very impatiently. Then after the selected elderly had gone to the van to sit, my colleague was still doing a count. This was when the driver kept chasing us to be fast. Not only that, my colleague did not inform one of the group leader that there was a replacement. So, there were some confusion going. Finally, the situation got into me and I asked my colleague whether she would be taking the bus or the van and I kept chasing her to get on the bus after that. This was the first horrible thing that happened.

When we reached SF, another horrible thing happened. This had never happened in any of the outings I had with the elderly. There were some elderly still in the bus, waiting to be alighted and one elderly was just about to alight to the pavement when the driver suddenly drove. We shouted for him to stop and some of the volunteers who were in front overheard him saying that we were so slow. What did he expect? Elderly leh, not normal young gals. Thank God no one was injuried.

The third horrible thing that happened was when we were counting the group members, suddenly one volunteer told us that she had not registered or paid for this trip. I was so shocked how she could manage to join us in this trip when all moved according to their groups allocated. Thank God there were some elderly who did not turn up or else I would have to ask her to take taxi to go home.

Though there were hiccups in this trip, I was glad to hear that the elderly enjoyed it. I actually felt quite bad when I thought of how I mishandled the situation when the first horrible thing happened early in the morning. I let the situation control me instead of the other way round.

God, please help me to change. Don't let me be controlled by the situation around me anymore but let me learn to control the situation. I pray for Your strength and wisdom to be mine during such times. Let me know how to handle this kind of situation in the future. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Personal glory vs God's glory

This weekend, I have been thinking through what one of mentors had told me regarding one of our gathering. Whatever we do, we must do it for God's glory. However, some people had been doing things to glorify themselves. For example, some people give money to charitable organizations so that they can show to the world that they are being kind to the underprivileged. Some give money to their spouses so that they can look good in front of their congregation. What a pity! Are looks more precious than our hearts?

God looks into our hearts. Nothing can escape from Him. At times, I tried to bargain with God. But I know that I lose. Nothing can hide from Him. I can deceive the whole world but not Him. When other people criticize us that we do not give to the church or the underprivileged, God knows our exact situation. He does not judge us like what the world judges us. If we give and do things to take note of what others are looking at us, we are a loser. And a terrible one.

As I remembered the scene about Money No Enough 2 where the mother was pulling through, the daughter-in-law and the sons were tugging the bag of blood meant for the mother. What is important in one person's eyes may be secondary to another person's eyes. When we are at our desperate ends, do you think God looks at our giving more than our hearts? Doing things that others will approve of us is more important or doing God's work is more important? I believe with all my heart that God looks more at our hearts. No matter what we have done wrongly previously, He still loves us and He understands what we go through. In God have I put my trust, I will not be afraid. To God be the Glory!

You Raise Me Up

As I listen to Selah's song, You Raise Me Up, many memories came back. How God has shown me His love, grace and mercy when no one shown me even the simplest thing on earth. What a wonderful God I have! Someone I can call my Friend.

Indeed, when things don't go my way, He is there to support me. When friends don't understand me or have no time for me, He is there to be with me, knowing every situation that I am in. He knows it like no other has known it.

I feel very treasured whenever I think of the times when I am being upheld by Him. When I am praying over certain situations and circumstances in my life, He is telling me things, ensuring me that He will never leave me nor forsake me. He shows me what I can be in Him when others show me what I can't only.

Yes, Lord. Because of You, I am alive! Many times of sufferings, abuses, accusations have been cleared because I have You to walk with. Though these times leave memories, I don't feel sad anymore. BECAUSE OF JESUS, I AM ALIVE!

Are we near end times?

Are we in end times now? Some may agree with this while others may just ignore it and say that we are just being paranoid.

Whatever our answer to this question is, the main thing to ask ourselves is, 'Is God living in our hearts?' Like what today Pastor Wilson shared, we are a temple of the Holy God. God lives in us. How? When we invite Him into us, when we said the sinner's prayers.

I remember when I first received Christ into my life. Things were alright at first. I rose up in faith but it quickly went down very fast, just like Simon Peter. I thought I was doomed. A failure Christian. But God did not give up on me even when I gave up on myself. He quietly set things right. He showed me the way back to Him. Even though I do not have the right way of doing things at times, He still shows me His grace, His mercy and most of all He shows me His love. No love is greater than this that He laid down His life for His friends. We are His friends. May we never, ever forget God's goodness!

Lord, I pray that Your grace will continue to abound in us. Holy Spirit, move freely among us to guide us through this life with Christ as our Vessel. Let us be focused and not shift our focus to something temporal. Lead us in Jesus' name, Amen.

Reviews of Apocalypse, Revelation & Tribulation

Today, I was going through my collection of DVDs and VCDs when I found a set of VCDs which I have not seen for quite some time. So instead of lazying around doing nothing, I decided to take out this set and watched it again.

In the first story of Apocalypse, it talked about how people, Christians, were suddenly disappeared. The anti-Christ then appeared and claimed that the aliens had gotten hold of them. Then there was a promise of peace. During this period of time, people began to look without their spiritual eyes. They began an attitude of seeing is believing. Until one lady, Hannah, a journalist, remembered what her grandmother used to tell her about Christ. In her grandmother's processions, she found 2 video tapes and began to read about them. They were tapes of people asking about the rupture and what this meant. Hannah managed to kneel before God and accepted Him as her Lord. But there are her beloved ones who still have not loved God. One of them is her husband. She tried hard to explain to him but he could not believe. Until one night, he decided to go to his father's grave and began to ask him what made him believe God till the end. There was light shining on his father's grave tomb. There was a bible verse written there: 1 Thessalonians 4:15-16. He went back to the car and flipped the bible to this verse. Then he decided to dig his father's grave to see whether what the bible said about those who were dead would be ruptured first. What he found was only his father's clothes, ring and bible. Not even his father's bones were inside the coffin. That's when he believed. Then came many accusations from the anti-Christ and began to prosecute those who believed in God. Finally, there was evidence to prove that the anti-Christ was a deceiver.

In Revelation and Tribulation, it talked about different people having different experiences and came to know God. In Tribulation, there was also the beast code being introduced. Many people did not believe God even when there was transmission on TV to show that God indeed existed and Jesus came to die for our sins and that the anti-Christ was a deceiver. However, there was also many who believed.

As I saw these movies, I began to wonder: will I be one of them who will rupture? God says in His Word that those who believe in Him will be ruptured. However, there will also be some who will be left behind. There was one scene which showed that those who ruptured have their clothes that they were wearing nicely folded. I wonder whether it will really be so.

Are we already prepared for God's return? Like the movie, Storm of the Century, these movies showed that satan could use our family members to threaten us. Can we stand up for Jesus? Or do we fall into satan's trap by renouncing God? As I saw the gallow equipment in the movie, I was reminded of the actual one which I saw when I was in Vietnam. I remembered going to one of the war museum. There was a real cell with writings on the wall and the gallow machine, rusty and tall. When I reached the room where the gallow machine was, I saw many people walking away without entering or looking. I plucked my courage to go in. As I did that, my legs were trembling. The gallow machine was tall, just like the many movies I saw regarding the end times. Somehow, there was a prompting whether I was prepared to lay there for Jesus' sake or to see my family members there. I have not stopped asking myself this.

Lord, will I stand for You till the end? I pray that I will. Grant me strength to carry on even when the environment tells me otherwise. I also pray for my family members that they too will be protected by You. It's not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the Lord of Hosts. Open the eyes of Your people to see You as the true God. Cut off all ungodly ties we, the Tan family has. I pray that You will break every curses and bondages. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Decision To Be Made

Yesterday, a brother-in-christ told me a proposal for me to earn more cash. I don't know whether I can do it or I am doing it according to what God has installed for me.

Getting a part-time job where I can earn extra cash is definitely on my cards for quite some time. However, I need a part-time job that is flexible and does not affect my full-time job. So being a part-time sales personnel sounds good to me. However, I am not sure whether I can do it or whether it is right to do. Am I in accordance with what God has planned for me if I were to do it?

Oh Lord, please give me some directives. If it is Your will for me to take this part-time job, I pray for obvious signs so that I can start doing it. If it is not Your will for me to take this job, then let there be many people telling me not to do it. Lord, please show me what I should do.

Review of movie 'Storm of the Century'

Yesterday, I watched a DVD borrowed from my younger brother's friend. The director is Stephen King who directed this film based on his book.

The story started with a old lady at home enjoying her time watching TV program when suddenly, there was a knock on the door. The visitor is a stranger, completely never heard before in a small town. When the old lady opened the door, the stranger killed her with his tungka. His tungka is not an ordinary one. It has the head of a snake and the head is in silver color. Then came the story where the storm ranged heavily on this town and how this stranger killed the people in this town. He even had the power to plant dreams into people. Whenever he killed someone, he would write on the wall, mirror or any surface, urging the people to give him what he wanted and he would leave them.

Finally, the night came when he revealed what he wanted. He wanted a child to carry on his 'trade'. So the people all gathered in a town hall and voted whether they should believe what this stranger said. Only one man, a constable, stood on his belief that no children should be sacrificed and even gave the consequences of such actions. However, every one did not want to believe in him, not even his wife. Finally, the vote came to decide which child should be given to this stranger. The stranger called all the wives of the children, a total of 8 of them. They were to pick up a stone from a black bag which this stranger had. Only the one parent with the black stone will the child be taken. Well, it seemed that this stranger had already arranged in advance. The constable's child, Ralph, was to be the one to carry on the stranger's target. No matter how the constable objected, the people let this stranger took the child away.

What struck me most in this movie was the last part when all the people were faced with the possibility of losing their child for the sake of the small town. It's like God asking me and everyone out there, that when face with difficult situations, how do we react? God knows what is important to us. So do satan. Most of us will view our family members as the most important thing in our lives. If one day, satan will to use our family members to threaten us to deny our faith in God, will we do that?

Lord, please help me to resist the devil till the end. Even when he threatens me with my family members, may I never be shaken but to stand firm in You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Reviews of Rose Red

Today I have watched the DVD of Stephen King's Rose Red. For those in other countries like USA or Canada, they may have heard of this story.

Rose Red is a haunted house which existed in this world. Haunted because some people claimed that people were missing while in this house or found dead. This is especially when Dr Joyce, a paranormal psychologist found Ellen's diary.

In this story by Stephen King, a paranormal psychologist gathered a group of psychics and psychokinetics to this house called Rose Red to investigate and document whether there was any paranormal activities there. However, strange things started to happen and some of the people in that group died or went missing.

After watching this show, it dawns on me whether there is such a thing as psychic. Some say that they are able to read the minds of those whom they touch; some say that they are able to predict what is going to happen to the people around them. Frankly speaking, I do not believe in this. Rather, I believe that the devil wants us to believe so that he can control our minds the things that prevent us from seeing. For eg, mind readers may tell someone that he/she will meet a good opposite sex partner and they will live a wonderful life if they continue to do something. When such things are said, the receiver will somehow lock this in his/her mind and make it happen without realizing it. This is the same as fortune tellers. They tell you your 'future'; then you lock the 'future' in your mind unconsciously and make it happen. So when it happens, you will say that this fortune teller is very accurate. What we are doing here is exposing ourselves to things that can be quite dangerous. Just like what Stephen King said when he was interviewed for Rose Red. Things can be very unexpected in life and if we are not careful, we will fall into the devil's traps. Besides, another thing I have learnt from this show is that sometimes, we are so pre-occupied in getting what we want, that we lose focus on what is really important to us. Dr Joyce was so pre-occupied in trying to get the results of paranormal activities, that she could not care less of any of her group members' lives. When each one went missing or died, she was only curious on whether the findings were documented in her equipment. When she was confronted by Steven, she justified her actions by saying that there was no such thing as dangerous and that some of them deserved to die. How sad!

May we never end up pursuing our own interests and forsake the lives of our loved ones or any one around us. May God guide us and keep us pure. Help us to have the wisdom to accept things around us and to discern what is from You and what is from the devil. Keep our feet strong and steady in You, Lord so that we can stand up firm on the greatest mountains. We may not receive any reward on earth for doing that, but I know that our reward is already in heaven. Thank you Lord for everything You have done and are doing and going to do in our lives.

Mess!!!!!

The past one week was a really mess week for me! Every thing started not as I thought it to be. Then last Saturday, I was left to handle the work with the elderly alone, without knowing that I was supposed to be the only one doing. That creates a bit of frustration. We have limited volunteers. In fact, on that day itself, there were only six volunteers. To get them to help in teaching the elderly to do art & craft was worse. The volunteers were not told what we were supposed to do, two volunteers were asked to do packing and two volunteers were doing the health checkup for the elderly. So basically, I was left with two other volunteers and we had to do everything in a short time. Then came another shock. My colleague announced that we would be giving some containers when the elderly were singing. Everything was a mess!!!!!! Then when one of the elderly was singing, she talked to another elderly so loudly that this elderly could not continue.

I really hope that I can do it better the coming week and do it according to what I have already planned. If not, it will be another messy time. In fact, some of the elderly were so restless. Everything was so draggy. Lord, please grant me the ability to encourage the elderly and let them do something useful, that they will not be so restless during their time with us.

Thank God that the donation for the elderly items was received with good response. In fact, thank God for Anne for coming up with the idea of moving to the crowds instead of let the crowds come to us. In less than an hour, most of the items were sold, so we left some for the Sunday event. On Sunday itself, though some were reluntant to give and some were thinking that we were 'begging' for money, there were also some who willingly give that little bit. I remember one lady (don't really know whether she is a Filipino or Indonesian) who gave one dollar for an item when all her friends looked away and pretended that they never saw us. May God bless those who willing give and though the amount may not be great, may You continue to bless them greatly.

Really after God's heart?

Today, I went to This Fashion - Special offer store and found out that they were playing worship songs in the shop. I don't know whether to be happy in hearing that or sad. Happy - because more people are beginning to recognize who God really is. Sad - because maybe they are playing this song not knowing what it really means. Much publicity has been given to the recently released Worship album which we can hear in TV commercial. Do people really listen to the lyrics or do they just play the album because it is popular now?

Whatever the motive, I pray that the Holy Spirit will do a marvelous work in all those who listen to this Worship album. May their spiritual eyes be opened and see the real God in their lives.